Remembering

Remembering 
When I was a little girl
My brothers and sisters
Loved me deeply
Perhaps it is the age gap 
When I was still schooling 
At the age of 10
I took the courage to write letters 
where all of my siblings were already out for work


The most significant impact is
I wrote letters to my siblings
Almost all of them return my letters with love
And their encouragement and love expression 
Is different from one to another

Every time I write

I cry

My emotional journey 

Starts with family love

Despite of this
I studied hard to get their approval
Many years later 
They still loved me unconditionally
But a few has some power struggle 
And different perspective of love


Today 
I called my big brother
His love for family remains 
He used to encourage me 
to study hard and play hard
during school time
Many times
He reminded me to take care of self
And many years of independence
He just showered me with love in a soft way
As a big brother 


Perhaps we meet for important family matters
Or family gathering during Chinese New Year
His soft approach has a big impact
Love from the heart
So deep 
By closing my eyes
I almost could hear his words clearly
See his face softly 
So kind
So lovely
So touching


Remembering his love
Suddenly reminds me of beloved papa & mama
Family love
Remains my true strength
Now I wanted to give back to family
To love my big brother & all other siblings
Just the way they are


Remembering family love
Suddenly I become big and bold
Strong and still
Just remembering family love
I find greater strength in life
And inspiration 


Remembering family love
It's time for me to give back 
On the journey to transform souls 
That have been so close to me before